It's not just you… we all have our moments

It's not just you… we all have our moments
Showing posts with label One night stand. Show all posts
Showing posts with label One night stand. Show all posts

Wednesday, November 20, 2013

ONE NIGHT STAND WEEK: *SUBMISSION* - An Unexpected Voyeur

This one comes to us from XY in TEXAS

Photo from idatedaily.com
I was 22 and, like I am now, hornier than I was smart. A beautiful girl approached my group of friends and singled me out. She said that she had something to tell me and took me by the hand.

We walked toward the door and she looked me in the eyes, "I promised myself that I wouldn't fuck a stranger tonight but I saw you and changed my mind."

That was the only pick up line I needed and we headed for her car. We drove to her apartment and, once inside, I got my first feeling that something wasn't normal. The apartment didn't have the vibe of a girl's place.

Before I could speak or question her, she was naked, standing in front of me in only heels. We were a pizza delivery away from filming porn.

As we made out, she narrated everything we did, "you're rubbing this" "I'm sucking that" sort of thing. It was hot in a weird sort of way.

We starting having sex and, no matter what position we were in, she insisted that we orient ourselves diagonally on the bed. I powered through although at this point I knew something odd was afoot.

Not more than five seconds after I came she gave me my clothes, pushed me into the living room and shut the door. My post-orgasm brain had the sense to hit the road. I dressed like the building was on fire.

As I shut the door I swear I heard a man's voice. I didn't know where I was but figured I'd walk until I found a phone.

At the end of the parking lot she drove up behind me, offering a ride home. I told her that there was no way and begged her to tell me what just happened. She drove away.

I was walking and thinking about how glad I was to be alive when her car approached again. She rolled the window down, said, "my boyfriend was in the closet, thanks for helping us out" and drove away.

I saw her at a football game years later. She looked as mortified with her memory as I was.

Monday, November 18, 2013

QUOTE OF THE WEEK

"I'm always looking for meaningful one-night stands." - Dudley Moore

ONE NIGHT STAND WEEK: The Escape Artist

It was his eyes. The eyes will do it for me, every time.

It probably also had something to do with the three or four tumblers of Vodka Tonics I'd consumed. (Bartenders are so irresponsible these days.) Honestly, at that point, I think I was seeing stars in just about everything, so I may have mistaken the Devil in his eyes for a "twinkle." All I knew is that I wanted to go skinny dipping in those eyes - eyes as blue as the deep blue sea...

They were fuckin' sexy, is what I'm trying to say, alright?

But I digress. The year was somewhere around five or so ago (give or take), and it was probably a Tuesday? In other words, the mood was just right for an evening of sweet, sweet love making.

Or super ghetto fucking, as it turned out. Dude wore a gold chain necklace that kept knocking me in the chin with every thrust he made. With each, "Oh, guuurrl" I was instantly aware that I was too conscious for this experience. And then God threw me a bone and I blacked out.

When I came to the next morning, Dude was no where to be found. I breathed out a heavy sigh of relief as I rolled over on to my side, but my bliss was cut short. That's when I saw it: his pile of clothes AND his wallet on my bedroom floor. He's still here… FUCK.
Photo courtesy of the inklingsoflife.com
But the place was quiet. Too quiet. I reluctantly rolled out of bed, and - wrapped in my bed sheet - began a room-to-room search for Mr. Thug Life, taking an inventory of any missing items… And that's when I discovered I was short (1) cat-hair covered blanket, and (1) pair of flip flops. Also, Homeboy was LONG the fuck gone.

Yes, apparently I'm that good in bed.

I never did get opportunity to thank him for breakfast...